There's no fridge in paradise!

And God sent unto Ben a message! The messages format was much a representation of the actual message itself. Throughout history The Lord our father in heaven has always used the more thespian side of his character to convey his will and words to the Abrahamic peoples of the world. Whether it be through the art of burning bushes, the huge fire storms that destroyed Sodom and Gomorra (which then give name to ungodly activities) or the subtle and poetic olive branch in the mouth of a dove; God has never failed to impress! (As a side note however, there is a distinct question that is posed by the newly biblically coined word "Sodomy"; we know, from this verb, what must have been "going down"  in Sodom ,however what was happening in Gomorra???? and what would 'Gomorry' be if it were a verb? )

As I was saying, that the Lord has always had a creative side is no secret...Just look at what he did with, well everything!! But... Gods latest incarnation to Ben showed a new tactic. God had already got to grips with the internet and blogosphere and now wanted to communicate in a new medium that he was as yet to try... God said unto Ben, using coloured magnetic letters stuck to the fridge, the following...

"Dear Ben Internet Prophet

                                  I am not emailing for two reasons: A. my hard drive has failed and B. I found these nifty magnetic coloured letters on a site called Amazon.com just before it happened and seeing as heaven is divine and thus things never go off, I have no fridge in paradise! Thus no place to put these fantastic little inventions, so I thought seeing as you are practically as good as Jesus, you could have them. 

     Now down to Business matters. The pop career did not go as well as I had hoped, it seems I’m not Fifty Cent or Carly Simon, and the Govt have cut funding for Prayer line so I have decided to use a new creative outlet to get the good word across... I am going to become a stand up comedian and I have even made my first joke (well actually Richard Prior wrote it for me as I have kept all the funny ones in heaven with me)... so here it goes......  A man ascends to Heaven; he's shocked at being dead but over the moon to be in heaven. He asks St. Peter where he's going to live now he's in heaven? Peter says “just pick a cloud any cloud," so the man does and finds a nice perfect fluffy one (yes they are all perfect).  A few days later Peter returns to the man and asks him how he's feeling but the man doesn’t look very happy, Peter asks " how can this be, your cloud is perfect and you’re in heaven, this is what all the good deeds were for."

The man replies “I know, I know my cloud is perfect but I keep looking next door and it makes my cloud seem like the boring cloud." So peter glances over to the next door cloud and then turns to the man and explains “Oh don’t worry about him, that’s Just Jonah on cloud 9, he's always having a whale of a time."...

Ok so that’s my joke... Gabriel assured me it’s fabulous, but the angels always agree.

Yours sincerely 

God" 

Ben was humoured but thoroughly unimpressed and thought that maybe God wasn't cut out for Comedy; but he would let God have a go. Seeing as God invented everything, he must have invented this as well! God failed to make large headway in the underground London scene and is currently touring  the beach resort circuit looking for his big break.